I know what I want... and its not this!

As you all know, me and Alex are not "together". We made an agreement that we would be separated but still try things out when our divorces were final. WELL, I've been holding my end but Alex has this crazy idea he can still keep tabs on me and tell me what to do. I was dumb enough to let him know what I was doing but as far as telling me what to do NOPE not anymore. Well, last night he called me about 1:30 AM telling me that he was coming over to my house, I repeatedly told him "NO" and just finally hung up. He calls me at 3:30 AM and says the same thing but instead he was saying "Baby, I need to get laid and I want to be with you" NEED TO GET LAID!! What is wrong with him?!?! Of course he was drunk and out with his cousins! So I blew it off and went back to sleep. He calls me again at 5:50 AM and says "I'm on my way" and I told him "NO" and turned my phone off, I had to get up in 20 mins to get ready for work! So at 6:10 AM he is yanking my screen door, about to wake up the baby so I finally let him in! He stumbled to lay in my bed and was like "Baaabe, Baaaabe, Baaaby" I ignored him! I was so disgusted with him!! I was thinking to myself, as I was getting ready for work, this is not what I want! This is not what I want for my children! I am not going to continue with this at all!! So I know he is going to call me as soon as he wakes up and try and sweet talk me but I am going to tell him flat out "Leave me alone, until you get your life right with God there will be nothing more between us!" and that will be that!!!

I finally went to church last night and will be going tonight too! Revelations Conference goes thru until Friday! It was good! Everything the preacher was preaching felt like it was for me! I know it was God talking to me and telling me what I need to do! And this morning proved it! I know I wasn't meant to have a drunk for a "husband" or someone who is still going to run the streets at night! And I am NOT going to settle for that! I deserve more, God knows my heart and my desires and I have faith that He is going to bless me and my children in so many ways but I have been blocking my blessing for Alex. Not anymore!

Oh and Lisa, I emailed you twice, and I don't think you're getting my emails but I'm getting yours!